❰ because the last thing anyone needs is for this news to be heard by the whole of the inquisition and start another riot when thranduil isn't there to wrangle everyone. aro can keep his shit together, adalia has less confidence in everyone else. ❱
I'm in the city. Hang on. [ There's a scuffle behind him, the sounds of him clambering up and gathering the things he'd laid out. ] I'll head for the stables. What's happening?
❰ in the time it took for aro to get away from the crowds of kirkwall, adalia has taken her hair out of its careful chignon and begun drawing a bath. it will take a while for the tub to fill, and longer after that to heat, so she's starting the process early. when aro returns, she picks the crystal up with a sigh. ❱
Aside from the sores on my tongue from constantly biting it, I'm well enough. I want to hear about yourself and Iessa, too, but first — I wanted you to know what the templars and the chantry are trying to get us to agree to. You can't tell anyone, though, alright? I don't know how much of this is supposed to be secret, but it certainly wouldn't make a lot of rifters happy, and without the more level heads around spreading any of this around could lead to more trouble than we need.
A lot of things. They want to either Harrow us or give us phylacteries, and if Rifters can't be Harrowed, well, how convenient, we all get phylacteries. They want to tie our fates to the mages, so that if they go back to Circles when all this is over we do too. They want to make lists of all of us and our abilities for them to have access to.
That's just the stuff I loathe, not to mention all the stuff I merely dislike.
❰ a deeeeep sigh, and the sound of water splashing as adalia dips her hand in. ❱
It's a ritual the native mages undergo, to ensure they're safe from demons. I'm not entirely sure how it works, but I know it can end in demonic possession, which means it can end in death. I'm looking into finding resources to be Harrowed myself so I can try to see if I can neutralize the threat.
[ Strangely, this doesn't sound quite as terrible to Aro as a phylactery, maybe because it sounds a good bit more like an adventure he'd undertake by choice.
Though, like many things here, their reasoning for it seems completely stupid. ]
So they put us at risk of possession in order to prove we won't be? Bloody circular reasoning. I don't understand these people. Listen, don't do it alone, will you? Not when we don't know how it works.
Right? It makes no sense. "We believe these people might be dangerous, so we'll put them in a position where overwhelming odds say they'll prove us right. Confirmation bias? What confirmation bias?"
And mages have been dealing with this for centuries. That loyalists even exist is beyond me, these people should have fireballed the Chantry into oblivion at least 500 years ago.
❰ the hate adalia feels for the chantry, as a rational faerunian with normal gods, knows no bounds. the chantry lies and cheats and murders in service of its maker, and everyone believes in it out of... guilt? desperation? disgusting. they need to be saved from their own conditioning. ❱
I have a Templar I trust I'm going to ask to keep an eye on me when I do it so if I go all abomination-y I won't hurt anyone. There apparently has to be someone in charge of the ritual, or something...? In any case, I won't be alone.
All right. Just be careful, Adalia, please. None of this is worth endangering your life over.
[ And honestly, he really doesn't trust the Chantry to care whether she lives or dies. He cares, and he doesn't like the thought of her doing this when she doesn't have to. ]
I agree with you, about the Chantry. Religion has never seemed so poisonous to me before. I mean, I was never any god's acolyte, but these people just...it's disgusting, the way they treat mages and elves.
[ He sighs, feeling suddenly tired. He wants to go home. He really, so badly wants to go home. ]
We should probably talk more about these lists they're after.
❰ not. at all. but at least she can sound earnest when she says it? ❱
I believe in the gods like anyone else, but this... the Maker isn't even here. There are no clerics, no paladins... The closest these people have to actual gods is spirits, and they hate them. It's mind-boggling to me. I don't understand them at all.
❰ it's really nice to hear from someone with sane opinions on the chantry and the maker. adalia sighs again, and runs her wet hand through her hair — her disgruntled noise is audible over the crystal. ❱
Registers, of all Rifters with magic abilities and native mages with "unusual" magic. I'm trying to convince the others that blocking them should be a priority, but no one listens.
Not to mention, they don't believe in any other gods, and we know for a fact that they're wrong! But that doesn't matter. It makes no sense to me.
[ Aro doesn't understand faith, not in the way these people do. There is no doubt about the existence of gods in his world. No one sensible would claim there's only one god.
He runs a hand over his face, thinking about that list. Obviously, he hates the thought. He hates it less than phylacteries, but he still hates it. His instinct is to tell them nothing, but... ]
The danger would be in what would happen if we could do something we didn't tell them, and then they discovered it. Quite honestly, though, I don't really know all that I'm capable of. If I tell them that, what'll they do?
❰ aro you are speaking adalia's language. her angry, bitter, polytheistic language. ❱
Yes! Right! How on earth could one god take care of all of creation? And if he can't, is he even really a god? And then you say that to them and they get all huffy, like you haven't just been asking logical questions that should have easy answers.
❰ ...right, she's getting distracted. back to the important part. ❱
Keep an eye on you for anything new, I'd imagine. The idea is that people have been keeping notes on all of us anyway, the Chantry just wants to see them. But what could the Chantry do with lists like that except prepare countermeasures against us, for whenever they think they'd need them? The Chantry is Thedas' enemy, almost moreso than Corypheus is. I just hate the idea of giving them anything they want.
[ She's speaking and he's nodding, regardless of how she can't see him. ]
It may make sense to someone who's never seen the work of other gods, but...
[ Another sigh. ]
It's no wonder they don't like us, you know. We know they're wrong and they don't like it. But honestly...
It's not just them. Of course they want to know what magic we can do, given how tightly they control their own mages. It makes me want to hold things back, not tell them everything, in case I someday need to play a card they don't know about to save myself. But if I do that aren't I just proving that they can't trust me? But then maybe they can't trust me, if I can't trust them.
❰ adalia is also nodding vehemently, even though aro can't see it. there's a reason he's one of adalia's favourite people here, and it's not just because he has a dragon too.
...okay, iessa is a significant portion. but not all of it! ❱
If you gain any new abilities, hide them as much as you can, I say. Whatever you've done up to now, you have to assume has been noticed and noted by someone, so don't bother to hide it. But if you learn anything new...
Tell me, and we'll go to Sundermount together to test things out. Iessa and Charis can look out for anyone who might follow us and alert us before they become a problem, so you can work on your new abilities in peace.
Fuck trust, if trusting the Inquisition means playing into the Chantry's hands. If you've got to reveal something to save lives, that's one thing. Saving people and doing the right thing is more important than secrecy or protecting yourself. But don't give away valuable weapons just to make the Chantry's life easier when the war against Corypheus ends and their war against the Inquisition begins.
[ Okay. That sounds sensible. Plus, she's agreeing with Aro's
general instinct to play his cards close to his chest, so he's very much in
favour. ]
That makes sense to me. I'm not their enemy, I'm not about to run off and
join Corypheus. That doesn't mean they get to own me. The Chantry certainly
aren't my church.
[ No church is Aro's church, and he's never felt particularly
strongly about religion. This one, however, feels the need to dominate
everyone. He's not going to be a part of that. ]
A list's not the worst thing in the world, Adalia. Do what you have to do
at those talks. I trust you.
[they've been at the tavern a couple different nights this week. inevitably, this kind of establishment is where adventuring parties end up. after you've fought direwolves and gone dungeoneering for treasure and leveled up quite a lot with various courtly intrigues and encounters with goblins, where else would you go? what else would you do, if not have a beer, make new friends.
all the better if your new friends are lovely and fair half-elves, even if they have got an uncomfortable penchant for pet dragons. most of the time, aro doesn't bring his dragon to tavern anyway, which is good.
they're five cups in, per each. the room is soft and fuzzy and the travelworn lines in aro's face have faded entirely, either from the influence of alcohol or enough nights good sleep. you get a little bit numb when you're drunk, which is exactly why willem wanted to play this game. he claimed one of aro's hands, turned it palm-up.] You have to guess what I'm writing, [he had said.] Sip for every time you get it wrong.
[he may have been drawing the letters a little messily. but also, honestly, there are just a lot of them. he's written it once. twice. y o u
paused to tease aro a moment. three times. y o u a r e. four.
five.
b e a u
six, seven. but aro's already started to finish the word in his mind, willem can tell. he ducks his head down to intercept the half-elf's gaze, flashes him a drunk, toothy smile. hello, love.]
[ Aro is used enough to taverns. He likes places like this, where he
can be anonymous and comfortable, fading into a crowd and pretending to be
part of it. He's never fooled about actually being a part of it; such is
the way of the wanderer. The only companion he can really rely upon is
Iessa, and she's hunting at the moment. His thoughts are a bit scattered,
really, a result of the alcohol he's been plied with. His head is light.
This isn't the first time this week, either, and as it happens, he's not
actually alone, either. He's with Willem, as he has been every time he's
come here. It's a strange feeling, being part of a pair. It's even stranger
that the barkeep had nodded at them when they came in, as if he expected
them. And recognised them. And knew that they always appeared together.
Very strange.
But nice, somehow. Of course he's aware of the danger in this, of
getting used to being with Willem, and perhaps thinking that Willem is a
companion he can rely on. Very dangerous thoughts. But still, he laughs at
his jokes, and hangs on his smile, and feels heat rising into his cheeks
when he spends too long looking at the warmth of his eyes. He gives up his
hand willingly, mostly to enjoy the feeling of Willem's fingers tickling
it.
That makes him laugh again, and sway in his chair. He leans against
Willem's shoulder, companionable and comfortable, and he flexes his
fingers. ]
You? [ He recounts, following the touch. ] You are. B. E. O
– no, A. B – e – a…u.
[ On that one he stops, and looks up at Willem. There's not an awful
lot of words that could begin like that. He looks up and sees that smile
and those eyes, and there's something about Willem that nearly looks
shy.
Aro quickly closes his fingers, catching Willem's and holding them.
With his other hand, he catches a couple of dark curly strands, running his
thumb over them. ]
I'm not. Not really. Not compared to you.
[ He leans closer, enough to feel Willem's breath on his lips.
Enough to smell the alcohol they've been sharing, too, which makes him
smile. ]
What if I did something stupid? Would you be annoyed? Or would you like it,
and keep saying nice things to me? If I did something…really stupid.
[ A brief flash of his tongue wets his lips. This isn't particularly
subtle. Blame the alcohol for that; he has brilliant moves otherwise,
honestly. ]
[let's be real here, willem bassey is not exactly the most incredibly intelligent person to have ever come through a tavern. your moves don't have to be smooth with him, only sincere. and despite his half-elfin charms, the sure capacity for deceit or manipulation as all wanderers need to get by in a world without a home, arohaerd seems unmistakably sincere here and now.
willem leans a little bit closer. he sees the bright, pretty luminosity of aro's eyes, the shape of his mouth pursing like a rosehip, in preparation of receiving a metaphorical bumblebee or just a kiss. 'just a kiss.' like he hasn't been thinking about it, through games of dragon chess that he lost badly, and little duels that he'd won handily, apart from those he'd lost. his sword is silent. the world feels that way too, the chatter and drone of background noise fallen away, abandoning his senses to heady liquor.]
But you're so clever, [willem says. he hopes his hand isn't sweating where aro is holding it, and partly in order to deflect attention in case it is, he draws a 't' on the back of the half-elf's hand, down his metacarpal and then across.] I very much doubt, under the cir--cumstances—
[pardon him. that was a slight hiccup, even as his eyes crinkle affectionately.] --that you could possibly do anything that stupid. As long as you meant it, as long as you weren't making fun. [sometimes, he doesn't notice when people are making fun.]
[ A T on his hand. B-e-a-u-t. The touch makes him shiver and flex his fingers. He'd guessed the word already, but that touch reinforces it, and it's sweet and gentle, and of course it isn't true, but when Willem looks at him like that, he can almost believe it is. He can believe it doesn't matter that he's not wealthy, or particularly good at anything other than wandering. Maybe Willem isn't thinking about practical things. Maybe he's just here in the moment, and maybe…
Maybe he's actually equally unsure. As long as you meant it, he says, as if there's some risk that Aro might not. He leans forward.
The alcohol has made his eyes fuzzy. It's annoying, he thinks, because he'd like to remember this clearly, and he's very worried that he won't. ]
Why would I do that?
[ He says, but he doesn't give time for an answer. He leans in, kissing Willem's soft full lips. He kisses him before he has time to rethink it, before he has time to talk himself out of it. His fingers flex again, this time curling inwards to hold Willem's hand. His other hand moves, too, coming to settle at his waist, and his body moves naturally in towards Willem. Chest against chest, a bit of a gap between their stomachs. It's a nice kiss. Warm, tasting of the beer they've been drinking, and tasting of something else too. Something sweet that's uniquely Willem.
He leans back, his lips catching Willem's lower one as he does. It's left him a bit tingly. His smile is lopsided, hopeful. ]
Is that okay? Cause I'll do it again, if it is. [ And softly, just in case: ] I'm not making fun.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
from skyhold during negotiations; crystal.
❰ because the last thing anyone needs is for this news to be heard by the whole of the inquisition and start another riot when thranduil isn't there to wrangle everyone. aro can keep his shit together, adalia has less confidence in everyone else. ❱
no subject
I'm in the city. Hang on. [ There's a scuffle behind him, the sounds of him clambering up and gathering the things he'd laid out. ] I'll head for the stables. What's happening?
no subject
❰ which is not, aro might notice, nothing at all. just nothing right now. ❱
Let me know when you get to the stables, I have some things I wanted to tell you.
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He picks up the pace, and a short time later he says: ]
All right. I'm away from the crowd, and there's no one close enough to hear. Are you all right?
no subject
Aside from the sores on my tongue from constantly biting it, I'm well enough. I want to hear about yourself and Iessa, too, but first — I wanted you to know what the templars and the chantry are trying to get us to agree to. You can't tell anyone, though, alright? I don't know how much of this is supposed to be secret, but it certainly wouldn't make a lot of rifters happy, and without the more level heads around spreading any of this around could lead to more trouble than we need.
no subject
I can't think who I'd tell. What is it that they want from us?
no subject
That's just the stuff I loathe, not to mention all the stuff I merely dislike.
no subject
Hang on, they want to Harrow us. What does that mean? Obviously it doesn't sound good, but I've never heard that spoken of before.
no subject
It's a ritual the native mages undergo, to ensure they're safe from demons. I'm not entirely sure how it works, but I know it can end in demonic possession, which means it can end in death. I'm looking into finding resources to be Harrowed myself so I can try to see if I can neutralize the threat.
no subject
Though, like many things here, their reasoning for it seems completely stupid. ]
So they put us at risk of possession in order to prove we won't be? Bloody circular reasoning. I don't understand these people. Listen, don't do it alone, will you? Not when we don't know how it works.
no subject
And mages have been dealing with this for centuries. That loyalists even exist is beyond me, these people should have fireballed the Chantry into oblivion at least 500 years ago.
❰ the hate adalia feels for the chantry, as a rational faerunian with normal gods, knows no bounds. the chantry lies and cheats and murders in service of its maker, and everyone believes in it out of... guilt? desperation? disgusting. they need to be saved from their own conditioning. ❱
I have a Templar I trust I'm going to ask to keep an eye on me when I do it so if I go all abomination-y I won't hurt anyone. There apparently has to be someone in charge of the ritual, or something...? In any case, I won't be alone.
❰ after a moment, then, softly: ❱
I appreciate your concern, though. Thank you.
no subject
[ And honestly, he really doesn't trust the Chantry to care whether she lives or dies. He cares, and he doesn't like the thought of her doing this when she doesn't have to. ]
I agree with you, about the Chantry. Religion has never seemed so poisonous to me before. I mean, I was never any god's acolyte, but these people just...it's disgusting, the way they treat mages and elves.
[ He sighs, feeling suddenly tired. He wants to go home. He really, so badly wants to go home. ]
We should probably talk more about these lists they're after.
no subject
❰ not. at all. but at least she can sound earnest when she says it? ❱
I believe in the gods like anyone else, but this... the Maker isn't even here. There are no clerics, no paladins... The closest these people have to actual gods is spirits, and they hate them. It's mind-boggling to me. I don't understand them at all.
❰ it's really nice to hear from someone with sane opinions on the chantry and the maker. adalia sighs again, and runs her wet hand through her hair — her disgruntled noise is audible over the crystal. ❱
Registers, of all Rifters with magic abilities and native mages with "unusual" magic. I'm trying to convince the others that blocking them should be a priority, but no one listens.
no subject
[ Aro doesn't understand faith, not in the way these people do. There is no doubt about the existence of gods in his world. No one sensible would claim there's only one god.
He runs a hand over his face, thinking about that list. Obviously, he hates the thought. He hates it less than phylacteries, but he still hates it. His instinct is to tell them nothing, but... ]
The danger would be in what would happen if we could do something we didn't tell them, and then they discovered it. Quite honestly, though, I don't really know all that I'm capable of. If I tell them that, what'll they do?
no subject
Yes! Right! How on earth could one god take care of all of creation? And if he can't, is he even really a god? And then you say that to them and they get all huffy, like you haven't just been asking logical questions that should have easy answers.
❰ ...right, she's getting distracted. back to the important part. ❱
Keep an eye on you for anything new, I'd imagine. The idea is that people have been keeping notes on all of us anyway, the Chantry just wants to see them. But what could the Chantry do with lists like that except prepare countermeasures against us, for whenever they think they'd need them? The Chantry is Thedas' enemy, almost moreso than Corypheus is. I just hate the idea of giving them anything they want.
no subject
It may make sense to someone who's never seen the work of other gods, but...
[ Another sigh. ]
It's no wonder they don't like us, you know. We know they're wrong and they don't like it. But honestly...
It's not just them. Of course they want to know what magic we can do, given how tightly they control their own mages. It makes me want to hold things back, not tell them everything, in case I someday need to play a card they don't know about to save myself. But if I do that aren't I just proving that they can't trust me? But then maybe they can't trust me, if I can't trust them.
What do you plan to do?
no subject
...okay, iessa is a significant portion. but not all of it! ❱
If you gain any new abilities, hide them as much as you can, I say. Whatever you've done up to now, you have to assume has been noticed and noted by someone, so don't bother to hide it. But if you learn anything new...
Tell me, and we'll go to Sundermount together to test things out. Iessa and Charis can look out for anyone who might follow us and alert us before they become a problem, so you can work on your new abilities in peace.
Fuck trust, if trusting the Inquisition means playing into the Chantry's hands. If you've got to reveal something to save lives, that's one thing. Saving people and doing the right thing is more important than secrecy or protecting yourself. But don't give away valuable weapons just to make the Chantry's life easier when the war against Corypheus ends and their war against the Inquisition begins.
no subject
[ Okay. That sounds sensible. Plus, she's agreeing with Aro's general instinct to play his cards close to his chest, so he's very much in favour. ]
That makes sense to me. I'm not their enemy, I'm not about to run off and join Corypheus. That doesn't mean they get to own me. The Chantry certainly aren't my church.
[ No church is Aro's church, and he's never felt particularly strongly about religion. This one, however, feels the need to dominate everyone. He's not going to be a part of that. ]
A list's not the worst thing in the world, Adalia. Do what you have to do at those talks. I trust you.
no subject
You hear what's going on in Minrathous?
no subject
[ Whatever else there is, that's the big news. He's with his own right now, his fear for her safety spiking higher than ever before. ]
Do you think we can reach them in time?
no subject
[ dragon. so that's cool. please don't burn up his ship, thanks. ]
'In time' depends on a lot of things. We'll reach them fast as the ship can handle, and if they keep their heads down, it'll be in time.
no subject
I hope you're right. You can count on me, anyway.
no subject
I appreciate that. Get your things together quickly. We leave soon as the ship's loaded.
no subject
I could leave now. [ Lol the very idea that he has things to get together. ] I'll come to help with loading.
no subject
That's well. Bring any weapons you prefer to use. There's a good chance we'll run into a need for them.
no subject
I have friends in that city. Believe me when I say I'll be motivated.
no subject
i'll just put this here cuz realizing theres no non-fr inbox :3
all the better if your new friends are lovely and fair half-elves, even if they have got an uncomfortable penchant for pet dragons. most of the time, aro doesn't bring his dragon to tavern anyway, which is good.
they're five cups in, per each. the room is soft and fuzzy and the travelworn lines in aro's face have faded entirely, either from the influence of alcohol or enough nights good sleep. you get a little bit numb when you're drunk, which is exactly why willem wanted to play this game. he claimed one of aro's hands, turned it palm-up.] You have to guess what I'm writing, [he had said.] Sip for every time you get it wrong.
[he may have been drawing the letters a little messily. but also, honestly, there are just a lot of them. he's written it once. twice. y o u
paused to tease aro a moment. three times. y o u a r e. four.
five.
b e a u
six, seven. but aro's already started to finish the word in his mind, willem can tell. he ducks his head down to intercept the half-elf's gaze, flashes him a drunk, toothy smile. hello, love.]
Cries I love this so much!
On Thu, Nov 1, 2018 at 7:23 AM wolfslayer - DW Comment < dw_null@dreamwidth.org> wrote:
<3333 i was planning it for a long time
I am so sorry for the confusion and how long this took.
[ Aro is used enough to taverns. He likes places like this, where he can be anonymous and comfortable, fading into a crowd and pretending to be part of it. He's never fooled about actually being a part of it; such is the way of the wanderer. The only companion he can really rely upon is Iessa, and she's hunting at the moment. His thoughts are a bit scattered, really, a result of the alcohol he's been plied with. His head is light. This isn't the first time this week, either, and as it happens, he's not actually alone, either. He's with Willem, as he has been every time he's come here. It's a strange feeling, being part of a pair. It's even stranger that the barkeep had nodded at them when they came in, as if he expected them. And recognised them. And knew that they always appeared together. Very strange.
But nice, somehow. Of course he's aware of the danger in this, of getting used to being with Willem, and perhaps thinking that Willem is a companion he can rely on. Very dangerous thoughts. But still, he laughs at his jokes, and hangs on his smile, and feels heat rising into his cheeks when he spends too long looking at the warmth of his eyes. He gives up his hand willingly, mostly to enjoy the feeling of Willem's fingers tickling it.
That makes him laugh again, and sway in his chair. He leans against Willem's shoulder, companionable and comfortable, and he flexes his fingers. ] You? [ He recounts, following the touch. ] You are. B. E. O – no, A. B – e – a…u.
[ On that one he stops, and looks up at Willem. There's not an awful lot of words that could begin like that. He looks up and sees that smile and those eyes, and there's something about Willem that nearly looks shy.
Aro quickly closes his fingers, catching Willem's and holding them. With his other hand, he catches a couple of dark curly strands, running his thumb over them. ]
I'm not. Not really. Not compared to you.
[ He leans closer, enough to feel Willem's breath on his lips. Enough to smell the alcohol they've been sharing, too, which makes him smile. ]
What if I did something stupid? Would you be annoyed? Or would you like it, and keep saying nice things to me? If I did something…really stupid.
[ A brief flash of his tongue wets his lips. This isn't particularly subtle. Blame the alcohol for that; he has brilliant moves otherwise, honestly. ]
nppp <33
willem leans a little bit closer. he sees the bright, pretty luminosity of aro's eyes, the shape of his mouth pursing like a rosehip, in preparation of receiving a metaphorical bumblebee or just a kiss. 'just a kiss.' like he hasn't been thinking about it, through games of dragon chess that he lost badly, and little duels that he'd won handily, apart from those he'd lost. his sword is silent. the world feels that way too, the chatter and drone of background noise fallen away, abandoning his senses to heady liquor.]
But you're so clever, [willem says. he hopes his hand isn't sweating where aro is holding it, and partly in order to deflect attention in case it is, he draws a 't' on the back of the half-elf's hand, down his metacarpal and then across.] I very much doubt, under the cir--cumstances—
[pardon him. that was a slight hiccup, even as his eyes crinkle affectionately.] --that you could possibly do anything that stupid. As long as you meant it, as long as you weren't making fun. [sometimes, he doesn't notice when people are making fun.]
no subject
Maybe he's actually equally unsure. As long as you meant it, he says, as if there's some risk that Aro might not. He leans forward.
The alcohol has made his eyes fuzzy. It's annoying, he thinks, because he'd like to remember this clearly, and he's very worried that he won't. ]
Why would I do that?
[ He says, but he doesn't give time for an answer. He leans in, kissing Willem's soft full lips. He kisses him before he has time to rethink it, before he has time to talk himself out of it. His fingers flex again, this time curling inwards to hold Willem's hand. His other hand moves, too, coming to settle at his waist, and his body moves naturally in towards Willem. Chest against chest, a bit of a gap between their stomachs. It's a nice kiss. Warm, tasting of the beer they've been drinking, and tasting of something else too. Something sweet that's uniquely Willem.
He leans back, his lips catching Willem's lower one as he does. It's left him a bit tingly. His smile is lopsided, hopeful. ]
Is that okay? Cause I'll do it again, if it is. [ And softly, just in case: ] I'm not making fun.